[no one in particular] My mom was like /dev/null
I would try and use my mom as a go-between when me and dad are having it out for some reason. Pretty typical stuff.
But it was never his fault. Nothing was ever his fault.
Critsizm <-> Mommy <-> Daddy
it was not!
Critisizm -> Mommy <- Daddy
Can you imagine how much fun that was? We are talking Manchurian Candidate level adherence. Real Nixonian.
I write and read that and realize how pouty and stupid it sounds for an adult to moan on about something like that, but there's a bigger point. Promise.
How much of that, starting from birth, does it take for that to become engrained just like "Santa is going to give you coal if you don't behave!" Except in this case, Santa is sitting right there! Looking contemplatively at something real impressive. I book about importantness. But in the universe of The Five Acceptable Things.
Understanding that dynamic is not something even an average teenager is going to comprehend. Much like a fish, he is unaware he is wet (teenager: oh, right, it's because I jizzed my pants last night.)
When that starts to ossify in an adult it turns into a concrete definitely right view of the world. Noble hero, dad, is martyring himself for us. Like, constantly. And like a rock, it is really, really tough to bust up and get rid of.