MHFATA!

Remember? We had so much fun! There were endless TV shows and sometimes you even knew someone who knew someone who made it big flipping houses. They pivoted from Beanie Babies and whamo -- a McMansion in the Everglades and a lifted Lambo... (a sea-meant pond and everything!)

It was tantalizingly practical. Just look at the charts, they said. Some of the area under that ever-positive curve could be yours, they said.

And we know that "The Housing Market" implodes simi-regularly and we know that "The Housing Market" is drowning in paperwork and regulatory red tape under which limitless skullduggery is possible.

Get your county bureaucrat cousin Ed to require a stamp, pass the stamp-stamper qualification test, set up your stampin` shop!

We know that "The Housing Market" is going to have a melt down of sorts some day soon. And we know that 90% of people who stand in line to vote probably own homes (they are used to pointless drudgery.)

Those people are going to be pissed as fuck, dear future leader. So have some creativity at the ready.

Some ideas:

• McDonalds receives a subsidy for which they will agree to give 10% off on all McBreakfast items before 5:30am local time, except in Arizona.
• The Keep Homes Free Act -- Subsidies for window grates, security cameras and other anti-invasion measures for All American Home Owners.
• Home owners get a Special Limited Time Offer on an Insanely Low interest rate 2nd, 3rd or manyith mortgage. These funds Must Bee Used for to make the house better. Also, this will reinvigorate the economy.
• Forgive Mortgages!!! We'll vote for you!!!

Some other ideas:

• The Surplus Home Capacity Rights of Way Act 3000 -- Whereas people don't need all that space, spare bedrooms, unoccupied bathtubs and the like must be made available to the Home Deficient (mycrashpad.gov)
• Mortgage rates are sometimes insanely low. And yet, I cannot get a mortgage. For me, as a voter, the mortgage rate is entirely irrelevant. Please make the mortgage rate to 23.95% big. This will cause people to give up on buying homes, freeing the old ones up for use.
• Cash for Chonkers -- You know those houses that are way to big for how many people live in them? Put them in a giant industrial chipper and pay the people money instead. Also, this will reinvigorate the economy.